Britt McHenry Mctowed

This Britt McHenry episode is fascinating. Raise your hand if you haven’t had your car towed. Put your hand down, I don’t like you. It truly is a terrible feeling to have your car towed. I’ve had mine towed a couple of times and your heart drops when you don’t see your car where you last left it; we love our cars, are attached to our cars, belong to our cars and vice versa. So when it is gone and your means of transport are gone, you, at least I, become very ungrounded. Here is what I remember about my car towings: there were definitely signs posted letting me know I was not allowed to park there…but I rolled the dice. People can talk about “predatory towing” all they want, till the cows come home, till they are blue in the face but I ask you, deep down in your heart of hearts, deep down in places you don’t like to talk about at cocktail parties, did you see a sign? Did you roll the dice?

You did.

Britt McHenry did.

Now because I rolled the dice, I ponied up the dough, and much like Jim Carrey in Lair Liar, took it up the tailpipe without a peep.

Britt though, not so much. Couldn’t reign in the chance to insult someone who had a role in creating that horrible feeling that descends into your blood when your car is towed. The perception is that Britt came across like an immature bully, hurling personal insults like a glorified prom queen mad at the unpopular/pretty/artist/towing employee girl for getting a glance from the quarterback.

And soooo, ESPN suspended her for a week and there are calls for her to be fired. All of which is noise that will soon be drowned out by the next news story, be it a plane crash or a Bono broken bone or a bounce house flying away from a kids party.

Are they (Heidegger’s Das Man – from the german) judging Britt McHenry? Hell yes. For the right thing? Who cares? The towing employee is going to move on with her life and maybe she’ll even be able to afford veneers and weightwatchers after this as a result of some kickstarter for her and Britt will get on with her life and continue to spout meaningless minutae behind a microphone while secretly wondering “am I double parked?”