Quickie S Wonders Ponders Pontificates Contemplates Muses

My street cred alter ego, Quickie S, has usurped my blog but I should be able to wrest it back from him in a fortnight or so. Till then he’s got a case to state:

[blog host cowers away]

Quickie S wonders, ponders, pontificates, contemplates, muses…

Why hiccups be getting’ the short end of the stick? Why ya’ll hatin’ on hiccups?

Allows me to represent hiccups my peeps. First off, what do sneezes have that hiccups don’t be gotten? Both be involuntary, right? Yeah that’s what I thought! B. Hiccups should get more love than sneezes cuz, per the wiki “ooh so sticky” pedia: “Medical treatment is occasionally necessary in cases of chronic hiccups.”


Where you at sneezes?! Huh, where you at! Wen’s the last time some playuh had to get trizeatment for a sneeze, yet you all love up them sneezes like they yo momma. Well truth hurts and a right hook from my favorite boxer, Carl “The Truth” Williams hurts too.


Now how’s about we stop dissin’ the cups you and start respecting the hizzzcups yo.
Here’s what my bad ass got for the cups of hic. You know how ya’ll be constantly blessing and god blessing after cheesy so sneezeys right?


-Quickie if I could just interject here that sneezes are semi-autonomous, convulsive expulsions of air from the lungs through the nose and mouth, usually caused by foreign particles irritating the nasal mucosa.


[punches blog host in the right temple then ties and gags blog host]


Yer homeboy won’t be frontin’ nomo!


Well I’m here to bring the love for hiccups. If we “god bless” for whack sneezes I’m here to propose we high five and man hug for hiccups. Bringin’ it right! This will be dope.


[blog host escapes poorly tied sailor’s knot, undoes gag]


-Quickie I think some readers might be wondering if they should wait until after a series of hiccups, or give the five and hug after each individual hiccup; and which comes first the high five or the man hug?

[pulls out stun gun and tazes blog host; blog host crumbles like feta cheese]

Don’t taze me bro!

Dumb ass. Individual discretion homeys! You wanna high five after every cup, then high five; you wanna man hug after 3 minutes of hizzy cups then man hug after 3 minutes of hizzy cups! You wanna combine and mix a la sir mix-a-lot then so be it, just as long as we respect the cups.

Respect the cups!

[tazes already crumpled blog host a second time]

I’m out!

Fizzuck snizzeezes!

Word!