Reality Radar

The optimism of Terry Pluto just can’t be corralled. You could put a shit burger in front of Terry and he’d say “Aww, you toasted the bun. How nice.” I’m not against optimism, it just rubs my reality radar the wrong way is all and in Terry’s Case, his blind optimism for the Browns borders on some sort of dissociative fugue state dating all the way back to his beat reporter days. Terry is optimistic after the Browns began the season 0-3 losing in overtime to the winless/hapless/less-and-less Dolphins in which the Browns missed three field goals. Yep, time to make lemonade from those lemons because the Browns are going places. In this case, this place is last in the AFC North but you already knew that. Oh wait did I mention that they will be in last place next year too? You see, the Browns are stockpiling draft picks and have a bunch of Kurt Gödel’s running stats into a Texas Instruments calculator while the current players run up not only the loss column but also the hospital bills because the team sucks so bad. 

Here’s the thing and you don’t have to memorize lines from The Natural to know this: 

“Losing is a disease…as contagious as syphilis.”

 And the Browns lose. A lot. The most actually and the next two years isn’t going to change the losing but the Terry Pluto’s of the world think that because there is a plan in place to get younger that somehow the Browns will get “winnier.” Yep, the stats and the Ramanujan’s tell us to get younger and build through stockpiling draft picks. 

Just one question: Who is going to change the culture of losing that permeates and saturates the ethos that has become the Browns? 

I lied. Just two questions: How is the culture of losing that permeates and saturates the Browns going to get changed?

…especially after two seasons of unprecedented losing with (got to follow the plan!) young players?

Young players are vulnerable. Psychologically. To losing. The disease of losing may be curable but we shouldn’t rely on the ones in the hospital beds, figuratively and literally, to do the curing should we? It's hard to play football let alone win at football when you are in traction.

Coach Hue Jackson will be the salesman of the millennium if he can get his young players to believe the team will win IN THE FUTURE even as the losses pile higher than the number of slings and crutches in the locker room. 

And I don’t want to sound like a walking tautology but isn’t the only way to not lose, to win? The ethos and the losing culture won’t change until wins happen.

The Pluto’s of the world are banking on the future and the “plan.” 

Be optimistic, wear rose colored glasses if you want, get season tickets for 2019 if you want; just know that getting into the playoffs is based on win-loss record. If you don’t believe me, ask the Steelers, Ravens, and Bengals. 

Hell, ask Butch Davis if you want.