People that get paid to talk into a microphone should be better.
Are we asking too much of people that get paid to talk into a microphone?
Look, I can't afford the Amazon Audible app and I can't get books on CD because my toddler shoved a nickel in the CD player and the dealer wants a gazillion dollars to take the whole stereo out, retreive the nickel, and put the whole stereo back in, so I am stuck listening to the radio for my two hour daily commute. Don't judge me.
Ergo, sports talk radio is a part of my commute.
As soon as I heard it I asked Siri to send me a text:
Bomani Jones said "...there's literally, not a soul on the planet who can guard him."
I rolled my eyes harder than they've ever been rolled and then said something to the effect of:
"Jesus fucking christ!" then immediately turned the station.
A fucking polka station would be better than this!
Literally? LITERALLY?!?!? Literally? LITERALLY?!?!?
OK Mr. Literally, how the fuck would a soul (a non-extended, immaterial, thinking substance) guard an extended, material substance?
It's the classic problem of parallelism you fuck!
Why would a soul even contemplate guarding an NBA player at all, let alone in the goddamn playoffs!
A soul can't even foul, even if he/she/it/god/monad/angel wanted to!
Just stop saying literally. This word must be banned.
Censorship is a last resort but this is a safety issue.
My safety issue.
Because if I hear another goddamn person who gets paid to talk into a microphone misuse it I am going to drive off a fucking bridge.
Safety first.
Please, give the mic to someone that knows how to use it:
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