Advice from my weekend:
Don’t head to food city Providence
RI all willy-nilly and accept a reservation with a wait time of one hour forty
five minutes, especially when you are paying a baby sitter 16 bones per hour.
Don’t accept said reservation with
one hour forty five minute wait time then mosey to bar across street where
scotch is $16 per glass, especially when you are paying a baby sitter 16 bones
per hour.
Don’t, after having accepted
reservation with wait time of one hour forty five minutes, drink scotch at $16
a glass then mosey back over to restaurant to check on reservation that hasn’t
changed wait time, and realize that you are about to eat your hand, especially
when you are paying a baby sitter 16 bones per hour.
Don’t call another restaurant and
inquire about seats at bar where they tell you that if you get there “soon”
they have two seats at the bar because you will inevitably drive in haste, pass
the valet, turn off main drag, double back, hand off to valet, sprint to bar,
only for them to tell you “the seats were just taken.” Especially when you are
paying a baby sitter 16 bones per hour.
Don’t walk across street to, let’s
face it, there-is-no-wait-for-a-reason restaurant, realizing you no longer
want to eat your hand, but your whole arm, and order copious amounts of marbled
meats and thick homemade pastas and realize you are thirsty from sprinting so
hard to the last restaurant, that you take your wife’s wine recommendation (twice) to only later realize it is $25 a glass, especially when you are paying a baby
sitter 16 bones per hour.
Don’t then have your wife tell you
that same said wine is only $20 at your favorite restaurant, to which you wanted
to go all along.
Especially when you are paying a
baby sitter 16 bones per hour.
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